The Longest Week
Director: Peter Glanz
Rating: PG-13
Release Date: September 5th, 2014 (limited release)
Conrad Valmont (Jason Bateman) is a near-40-year-old manchild born with a silver spoon in his mouth. After his parents left for a cruise that has lasted for more than 30 years, Conrad was left to grow up under the pampered care of his estate’s caretakers, resulting in a case of arrested development (heheheh). When his parents decide to get a divorce, they cut off Conrad’s allowance, leaving him to fend for himself with no money or job, resulting in him turning to his only friend, Dylan (Billy Crudup), for help. Unbeknownst to Conrad, a beautiful woman whom he met on the train, Beatrice (Olivia Wilde), is Dylan’s current crush. Despite agreeing not to make a move on her, Conrad pursues a relationship with Beatrice, threatening to destroy the only friendship he has. However, the relationship is built on a foundation of lies as Conrad has simply kept up the appearance of his wealth rather than come clean to Beatrice. In the span of a week, Conrad loses his inheritance, risks a falling out with his friend, and falls in love all at once.
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The Longest Week honestly feels like a Wes Anderson film. However, whereas Wes Anderson films are able to mix whimsical elements with deep, fully-formed characters, The Longest Week feels hollow. Wes Anderson films always feature protagonists with wealthy backgrounds finding themselves in fantastical situations in wholly entertaining ways. The Longest Week, however, takes the Wes Anderson brand of storytelling and affluent characters without the whimsy, creating a story that feels like a copycat rather than its own film. The largest perpetrator is the dialogue throughout the film. Conrad and the rest of the characters will these one-liners or quips that are so dry and bland, yet are delivered stone faced with no real understanding of the absurdity behind the words. Could this be a reflection of the characters’ affluence and detachment from real human interaction? The argument is definitely there. However, it smells too much like a Wes Anderson ape rather than a character building motif for the film itself.
Despite my issues with the film as a whole, I can’t ignore the performances given by the cast. While Bateman might feel a bit typecast, he’s definitely familiar with this type of character (morally ambiguous, somewhat likable jerk), and his comfort in the character type always helps his performances. Crudup and Wilde also deliver solid performances in their roles. However, the best performance in The Longest Week was also the most underutilized. Jenny Slate (Obvious Child) plays a minor role as Beatrice’s friend, Jocelyn. While she’s somewhat a part of the same circles as Conrad and the others, also exists outside of it. She’s not wealthy like the others, is still in school and lives in a dorm, and actively critiques the pretentious nature of their lives without being pretentious in doing so. Her character would have served as the perfect foil to the wealth and grandiose of the other characters as a means for the audience to relate better to the film through her, but it’s unfortunate that she only served as nothing more than a minor plot point.
The Longest Week is a poor man’s Wes Anderson film. It attempts to copy that director’s charm, but doesn’t quite match it… or even come close. Jason Bateman fans might enjoy the film, given the film’s typical “Bateman protagonist.” However, anybody else looking for something more are better off looking elsewhere for their weekend movie fix.