Post College: The Dreaded Return Home
As a 23 year old post-college student who has moved back home and has been living under my parents' roof over the past year, there are definitely pros and cons to the situation.
Obviously, everyone has a different relationship with their family. I suppose I am lucky enough to consider myself as having a “good”, or at least stable, relationship with my parents and siblings. However, I feel like since becoming roomies with my family members again, there is this sense of freedom I feel like I’ve lost since moving back home.
This loss of independence includes a financial dependence on parents for certain resources, especially if you’re still in that awkward limbo "searching for a job” phase after graduation. Other restrictive areas include abiding by rules, overprotectiveness, as if we’re not competent to take care of ourselves at 22, and petty fights that you only have with your family as hostility and tension increases from dealing with each other on a daily basis. If there are two things I have learned since moving back to my childhood home, it’s that having "your room" at home is VERY different from having “your room” in an apartment with roommates. Also, phone calls and voice mails are much different from the face to face presence of your parents nagging.
We all know that our parents are just trying to look out for us, that is their job. And with that comes a safe, warm bed, food on the table, and reliable laundry services. But it is difficult, for all of us returning home, to accept help that we need and pay the price of our independent practices after 2-4 years.
Here are a few tips I’ve learned to help lessen the blow of living at home.
- Take a break! Whether you plan to go return to your college town and to visit your friends, or you’re going out for ice cream with a friend, get out of the house. Take a relaxing walk or go visit your fun aunt for a day
- Get a job, any job, or volunteer while you are looking for your long term career. It will give you an excuse to get out of the house and feel like you are doing something with your time during the day. Plus, any experience is helpful on your resume
- Invest in a good pair of headphones
In a report published by the Huffington Post, the article questions why there has been an increase in millennial moving home after college. Even after the recession, the numbers of university students returning to their parents’ home have continued to increase. This concept of earning $40,000 after college may be true for some in the right field with a full-time, all year round position. However, that isn’t the case for every college student. There are extenuating circumstances.
From a personal standpoint, most college students feel like they need to be somewhat financially stable before moving back out again, or at least the ones I know. This means paying back their student loans, or even a portion of what you may owe your parents before affording rent. Not everyone can earn $70,000 right out of college. According to a report by the Bureau of Labor Statistics in 2015, the median earning of graduates with a bachelor degree is $1,137 per week.
This idea that millennial are rushing back home to their parents’ homes also depends on your parents' class standing, and whether some graduates are fortunate enough not to have to pay back loans or reimburse their parents for their college tuition.
Some take up a assistant positions at schools, personal trainer jobs, receptionist jobs, and some obtain a minimum wage job through their university, all positions that pay $30,000 or less. Some, such as myself, juggle multiple part-time jobs. In my case, one of which is internship based and one that is paid.
One of the major factors that I think is also forgotten is experience. For a full-time position after graduation, it isn't as easy as simply earning a degree and getting employed for 40 hours a week at a permanent job. And every field is different, however there are numerous fields such as graphic design, communications, music and sociology majors that require at least one year of experience according to sites like LinkedIn and Indeed.
Every circumstance is different. But no matter what the case may be, and no matter how much we grit out teeth and roll our eyes, we appreciate all our parents have done for us over those college years and beyond into returning home to them.